The Etiquette of beer pong

This summer I had a very different experience playing beer pong that I would like to share. In order to be more clean, this group of people put water in the cups and had two cans of beer on each side. Every time the other team made a cup, you set it aside and sipped your beer. I lost because I forgot to pull the cup and the other team made that cup again claiming the "ghost cup" rule. My partner and I were flabbergasted! So I said I would never play beer pong again. That is until I played it the right way.

College students all over have been playing beer pong ever since plastic cups were invented. The point of playing beer pong is to get the other team drunk, not to win. If you play for bragging rights or play to win, you are missing the whole point of beer pong. So I would like to present some rules to make beer pong a respectable drinking game.

Cups must always be filled with equal amounts of beer

For people of my generation, this is a no-brainer. But for the current college students, they seem to be okay with not drinking the substance in the cups. If both teams are just supposed to drink the can of beer with water in the cups, it is not a fair drinking game. You cannot regulate the amount one drinks if the cups themselves are not filled with beer and they are not drunk. If you do not like beer, then fill the cups with a cocktail, wine cooler, wine, or even pure liquor. To make it even more interesting, fill most of the cups with beer, but put liquor in a few. Having to drink the beer from the actual cups also gets rid of this juvenile "ghost-cup" rule.

Drink your own drink while playing beer pong

Chances are that if you are playing beer pong, you are at a party that serves alcohol. So you should also be drinking some beer while you are playing. I feel it is rude to not drink while you are playing a drinking game. You wouldn't drink water if you are playing King's cup, what is the point of putting water in the King's cup?

Bitches blow and dudes finger

I think most people use this rule. There is no reason that you couldn't do the opposite. But it's a tradition and you should obey this rule to honor our fallen comrades who made this rule.

On Fire

This is a bullshit rule. I don't even understand it, but if you are drunk, like you should be when playing this game, you shouldn't comprehend this rule anyways.

The Rebuttal

I also think this is a bullshit rule that was invented by law students, but it can also be very fun to make a cup and stay in the game. I think if there is one table and lots of people wanting to play, lets just have it be that the last cup gets drank along with the remaining winner's cups.

I hope that the next time I play beer pong, it is an honorable drinking game. Gentlemen and ladies need to drink from the cups in a traditional and honorable way. I hope that I play with honorable people who want to drink and are willing to risk getting drunk if they suck. But if everyone is drinking, nobody should have superior beer pong skills. If somebody is bragging that they are a better beer pong player, make sure they are drinking and maybe get them a couple of shots so their shit-talk can be nothing more than shit-talk.